my memorable christmas

the philippine christmas celebration they say is the longest. it starts as early as september and ends on january. i also think it does. people starts to become joyful and thinks of christmas on september. but for me, my christmas started on december 10.

we decided to have a community outreach for the fire victims in tejero. it was a heartwarming experience. seeing the smiles on the faces of our beneficiaries is more than enough. i believe that all great things begin with a simple step and not taking that step is the biggest sin. i know that what we offered was not enough but it is a step. this made me realize that if people are more compassionate towards others, what a great difference this would make to the world. in our case, the small effort of 12 people made 70 families a bit happier.

it was also on december when i joined a funlympics. i was never the sporty type from the start but i know how to use adrenaline. i was surprised myself that i totally enjoyed the event. we had paintball early in the morning. it was fun when you hear someone scream "ouch"; it was fun knowing that you were able to hit. but the bullets are really painful, no joke. in the afternoon, we enjoyed an unusual obstacle course. it definitely is not good for acrophobic people like me. i always thought of quitting during the course but my heart pushed me to continue. and yes i did! the late afternoon was spent on race karting. i don't drive and i admit i am the worst even on simulated driving but this is fun. i just sped up and survived with no scratches. wahihihi. this made me think of the importance of a good health. the world is wide and there is still so much more to explore. be fit and take the challenge.

rules of flirting

i always knew flirting was an art. tickling sensations and getting responses from mere gestures is an art way above there. as an art enthusiast, i researched on it and stumbled upon this article. i was never a flirt... mmm... or was i? i couldn't tell but i always smiled. bwahahahaha. now let's get going.

APPROACHEE (the magneto)

• Rule 1: Smile.  Just because someone looked your way doesn’t necessarily mean you are liked by that person (maybe you still have pesto stuck between your teeth).  To test the water, so to speak, smile.  If you get a smile back, that still wouldn’t mean he likes you.  So smile more – and wider this time.  If his smile widens, too, then there may just be something there.

• Rule 2: Don’t stare.  Only ugly people stare.  That’s not a joke, but a statement of a fact.  Beautiful people (why they’re the “approachees”) give furtive glances, no more.  It teases the approacher, and, at the same time, provides the approachee with ample time to look if the tentative smiles are returned, so the next steps can be taken.

• Rule 3: Wink.  Another way to test the water, albeit more blatant.  This is somewhat optional, however, since not that many can wink sexily.

• Rule 4: Nod gently.  If somewhat sure the target is returning the flirting, nod gently – this should encourage them to approach you.

• Rule 5: Shake head while smiling.  Sometimes the target thinks highly of himself because he was being flirted with, in the first place, so he immediately pretends to be disinterested (it thus becomes a battle of wills on who will stay as the approachee).  When this happens, make sure to catch his attention again, and then smile at him (as naughtily as possible) while slightly shaking the head.  Then give a somewhat longer-lasting look (still not a stare!).

• Rule 6: Feign disinterest.  Talk to your friends while occasionally looking his way.  When you catch him looking back, forget the nice smile this time – give a flat smile, instead, coupled with a slight nod, before looking away to continue conversing with your friends.  This is to tell him you have other people in your circle (he isn’t the only one in the party).

• Rule 7: Accept the truth.  After Rule 6, try Rule 1 (only Rule 1) again.  If he still doesn’t take any steps, then he may not really interested in you in the first place – or is still feeling too beautiful for you, so is expecting for you to make the initial moves.  If you don’t think he is worth it, move on.

APPROACHER (the daredevil)

• Rule 1: Smile.  While looking around, smile – or at least look interested and interesting to what is happening around you.  This way, you check what’s in the market, while, I bet, getting checked, too.

• Rule 2: Wait for a reaction.  In the interest of self-preservation, approach only those who may return whatever it is you are giving out (unless you are used to getting dumped), so wait for some signs, e.g. smiles, nods of acknowledgment, et cetera.

• Rule 3: Always approach with caution.  Even when you think you got the right signals, the approachee may just be playing with you, so approach with care (e.g. pretend to be just buying a drink at the bar, so you are just passing his way; or pretend to bump against him while dancing), and wait for even more signals (e.g. more glances, wider smiles, greetings, et cetera).

• Rule 4: Have self-respect.  If, at any point while talking to the other guy, you sense you are not really liked, the truth is you are not really liked.  So just come up with some lame excuse (e.g. say “My fuck buddy’s just arrived” while nodding towards a drop dead gorgeous guy you will never, ever even be able to touch) and leave with whatever shred of dignity you can still hold on to.

• Rule 5: Learn the art of dumping.  Just because you are the one who approaches doesn’t mean you always have to be the one to be rejected.  If, for any reason, you don’t find the target that nice up close, dump him – there are more to approach.

good thing i haven't stared. bwahahahaha. unknowingly, i did some of these but i never really intended them for flirting. maybe i am but a sexy thing. (overconfidence flooding in). oh well, i'm nothing but words so no worries in there. but really, i think these are effective. 

as a final say, go out and enjoy! you don't need rules to follow. just feel what you feel and act accordingly. it will all come out naturally... or even spurt!

6 patches

6 things to patch is OK, am i not right?

waiting with friends is the hardest; we were supposed to start at 2. she was a bit sarcastic too. i know how you feel but you don't have to shove it in our faces. just contact the damn thing and tell us if you can't do it now. i hate to wait. and i hate to wait not knowing whether we will be served. might as well tell us now so we can find someone else. this was even a trick for i was expecting a handsome man to do the honors. but i kept my cool, i was never the bold one.

sitting in a narrow space is even worse. i can't even extend my legs to the fullest. and there is this eerie feeling of nothingness in that place too. good thing the tv was on. at least i was singing along with the show. and there were magazines. damn, all were old issues. what can i get from cosmopolitan? tons of stuff about dealing with your man, touching your man, teasing your man, giving him the best pleasure and ecstasy... but i can't relate. i am single. in fact i have never had a loving relationship, nor a sexual one. no one dared to take me and i never bothered.

we were called in one by one. the squeaky, tingling, annoying sound is a bit hard to take. it didn't help at all. i was even more nervous. out came one and i was left alone in that cramped holding area.

it must have been a good 20 mins before my time came. i was prepared to answer her questions; it was 3 years ago, i could have said. but she didn't ask. is she serious about this? she just started her thing. there was no pep talk, we proceeded as planned. i guess she was tired--what horror could she have witnessed earlier? i hope i won't add to that. and there goes that tingling sound again.

finally she talked. and gave her advice and findings. 6 patches needed. i was a bit shocked. only 6? in 3 years, just 6? amazingly unbelievable. the other had 11 and 15 but i have 6.

enough...

i need to come back sometime for this. i would have liked to finish it all now but she can't. and there goes that lame excuse again, it was hard to contact the agent. but i  totally get it. no worries, i will be back.

then i felt squeaky clean... or rather my teeth were.

that dentist actually did a great job. but i need to come back for the 6 fillings.

more to come then...

12 TYPES OF GAY

got this message recently from my mail and i just have to share it to you guys. wahahahha. ganyan pala ka dami? sobrang itemized nito siguro. of course, credit goes to whoever wrote this, i just shared it remember? disclaimer ko na din yan, baka kasi may sumugod at maghamon ng away. hate ko pa naman ang confrontations. bwahahaha. i also would have liked to add pictures but decided not to. baka ma ban pa ang site. wahahahha. anyway, tell me which number are you? enjoy!

12 TYPES OF GAY

1. CLOSET GAY - the basic, mga baklang a...yaw umamin ng kanilang kabaklaan. Sila ay madalas na pigil at laging pinag-iisipan ang kanilang kilos. Madalas pag nasa maraming tao, kilos lalaki sila pero pag dilim, dun lumalabas ang totoong kulay.

Bukambibig: "Huwag kang maingay, hindi alam ng tatay ko na bakla ako!"

2. SISTER L - baklang lantaran sa kanilang mga kabaklaan. Sila yung mga nagdadamit ng pambabae, nagme-make-up, at yung iba, nagpapa-sex change.

Bukambibig: "Punta tayo sa katabing bar, maraming mga lalaking gwapo dun!"

3. MACHO-CHOPA - baklang hindi mo aakalain dahil mas guwapo at macho pa sa tunay na lalaki. Ito yung mga baklang maskulado, nagdyi-gym madalas upang magpalaki ng katawan. Pero pag kumilos si macho-chopa e halata mo ring charingdahil mahilig magpa-cute sa mga guwapong trainor sa gym.

Bukambibig: "Hi, can I know your number?"

4. MALDITA - baklang nakakaimbiyerna, masyadong nagmamaganda kahit na mukhang pwet ng baso ang mukha. Madalas mataray, parang laging nireregla. Masyado ring insecure ang maldita sa mga magagandang babae.

Bukambibig: "Che! Lumayas ka sa harapan ko. Sinisira mo araw ko! Bruha ka!"

5. SPICE GAY - baklang elite, socialite, laging nasa mall, starbucks, at madalas gumimik sa Malate. Kadalasan maiingay ang mga spice gays. Madalas binubuo sila ng 3-5 sa isang grupo. Madalas itong naka-wheels at mga branded ang sinusuot na damit. Madalas rin silang may shades na suot-suot. Sa pananamit naman, mahahalata mo rin na bakla sila dahil mas kikay pa sila kaysa sa mga babae. Pero hindi sila nagdadamit ng obvious na pambabaeng damit. To add, medyo mayabang rin ang mga spice gays.

Bukambibig: "You know, I bought this bag from Italy. It’s Gucci and it is very expensive."

6. SANTA CLARA - baklang may magandang determinasyon. Siya yung relihiyoso. Madalas siyang nagiging katekista, minsan pumapasok sa seminaryo upang maging pari. Hindi gaanong lumalabas ng bahay dahil parating nagdarasal upang layuan siya ng tukso. Madalas siyang active sa charity works at novenas. Kaunti lamang ang mga Santa Clara pero sila ang mga baklang huwaran.

Bukambibig: "Diyos ko, tulungan mo po akong lumayo sa kahit anumang tukso. Amen."

7. BUD-WISER - hindi ito pangalan ng alak o beer, another type ito ng gays. Ito yung baklang hindi madaling maloko ng mga lalaki kahit guwapo pa siya. Masyadong masinop sa pera at pessimistic with regards to men. Kadalasan siya yung nagtatagumpay sa buhay. Minsan mas pipiliin pa niyang mag-asawa ng girl kahit na diring-diri siya kaysa kuwartahan ng lalaki. Kaya siya nag-aasawa ng girl dahil para hindi siya makuwartahan nito.

Bukambibig: "Manloloko silang lahat!"

8. SANTA CLAUS-A - opposite ng BUD-WISER, ito yung baklang bigay-kaya - sa lalaki niya o sa mga kaibigan, kapamilya o kamag-anak niya. Madalas walang pera ang mga Santa Clausa. Sila ang mga baklang madaling maloko. Magastos rin ang mga ganitong type ng gays.

Bukambibig: "Anong gusto mo? Ibibigay ko ang lahat kahit wala na akong pera."

9. DETECTIVE CHUVA - baklitang daig pa ang isang detective kung subaybayan niya ang kanyang "special someone". Ika nga, stalker. Lahat ng tungkol sa kanyang crush e alam niya. Ni ultimo kung kailang ang birthday, kung ano ang favorite food, favorite movie, favorite hung-out, favorite blah-blah. Madalas siyang panakaw kung tumingin. Pasulyap-sulyap lang kuno pero pinagnanasaan na pala niya.

Bukambibig: "Mapapasaakin ka rin balang araw…"

10. HANDSOMMA (Pronounciation: hand-sa-ma) - gay na biniyayaan ng mukha. Heto yung mga tipong habulin ng babae. Minsan ang mga Handsomma ay closet gay, pilit na itinatago ang tunay na pagkatao. Sa panlabas, chickboy si Handsomma pero deep inside, lalaki ang gusto. Sayang ang kaguwapuhan ng mga ito at tiyak na ang laking panghihinayang ng mga babae.

Bukambibig: "Yuck, hindi tayo talo noh!"

11. ECLATUGZ - gay na mahilig tumagay. In short lassenggera este lassengero. Mahilig mag-aya ng inuman si Eclatugz lalo na kung ang aayain niya eh yung crush niya. Kunwari aayain ng Eclatugz ang kanyang crush sa isang inuman. Tapos pag nalasing na ang kawawang guy, patay siya! Tiyak pagpipistahan na siya ni Eclatugz.

Bukambibig: "Pare, inuman tayo! Minsan lang toh noh!"

12. MANIAC - uri ng gay na may maling determinasyon. Ito yung mga maniacs o mapang-nasa sa kapwa lalaki. Siya yung tipo ng gay na gagawin ang lahat para lamang masatisfy sa kanyang carnal hunger. Madalas ay pedophile or maaaring hustler ang maniac.

Bukambibig: "Sa akin ka lang! Sa akin ka lang kung ayaw mong mamatay!"

ideal type

hmmm. after 2 days of working out, i thought that i should have a goal. as my instructor told me, numeric goals (ideal weight and time frame) are more practical. so i went home last tuesday with this in mind. what is my goal???? what do i want to achieve???

for the time frame, that is quite easy. i should reach my goal before our family reunion this december end. very near. it is a month from now. uhhhh... scary.

now the weight is more difficult. at 24.5 BMI, my weight is normal to my height. but it's in the upper category-- overweight starts at 25 BMI. i then searched the net for a goal. browsed... browsed... but the answer came from old emails. spare me from your questions about the email contents please. and right there and then it became my phone wallpaper. i just had to see it everyday to remind me of my goal. thank you very much to the anonymous who shared this picture in my mailbox.

satisfied with my find, i shared it to my colleagues the day after. they said the body was great, but they don't want me to be like that. it won't fit me they said. well, who can blame them? me and the picture/wallpaper are complete opposites. i've always been this lovable creature but the damn wallpaper was oozing with sexiness hot. as in HOT!!! definitely my type... hmmm... ideal body type. wait that might sound something else. i want to have that body... hmmm... that still sounds wrong. wahahahaha.