ideal type

hmmm. after 2 days of working out, i thought that i should have a goal. as my instructor told me, numeric goals (ideal weight and time frame) are more practical. so i went home last tuesday with this in mind. what is my goal???? what do i want to achieve???

for the time frame, that is quite easy. i should reach my goal before our family reunion this december end. very near. it is a month from now. uhhhh... scary.

now the weight is more difficult. at 24.5 BMI, my weight is normal to my height. but it's in the upper category-- overweight starts at 25 BMI. i then searched the net for a goal. browsed... browsed... but the answer came from old emails. spare me from your questions about the email contents please. and right there and then it became my phone wallpaper. i just had to see it everyday to remind me of my goal. thank you very much to the anonymous who shared this picture in my mailbox.

satisfied with my find, i shared it to my colleagues the day after. they said the body was great, but they don't want me to be like that. it won't fit me they said. well, who can blame them? me and the picture/wallpaper are complete opposites. i've always been this lovable creature but the damn wallpaper was oozing with sexiness hot. as in HOT!!! definitely my type... hmmm... ideal body type. wait that might sound something else. i want to have that body... hmmm... that still sounds wrong. wahahahaha.

you can dance

@title, not really me but they can. i've always been an avid fan of "so you think you can dance". i have watched the show from the first time i had internet. of course i don't live in the US and have never been there, but through the ever dependable internet i can still appreciate the beauty of dance.

the show has really grown in me. i can still recall the best performances i've seen. and seeing dancers with such power and emotions makes me wish i was a dancer myself. some cells in my body even think they can also do the tricks, but most of my brain don't. maybe it's time to take dance classes, it would be a great work out too. hmmm... it's not too late i guess. hmm... suggestions people...

the 8th season of the show has just started and even from auditions, 2 dancers caught my attention. surprisingly, i just learned that they were both filipinos. yehey!!! philippines represented!! woot woot!!! if they can dance, hmmm then maybe i too can. i wonder...

i now follow both in twitter. and i even got a reply.

innocente6 fritz jimenez 

@ 

@D8Tadd wait wait. so you are part filipino? cool! do you know any philippine language?

6 hours ago 

D8Tadd Tadd Gadduang 

@ 

@innocente6 I'm actually Full Flip, but can't speak Tagalog...haha, I know swear words though from when my parents would yell at me! =p

4 hours ago 

in reply to ↑

@innocente6fritz jimenez

@D8Tadd well at least you know some. so that makes 2 Flips in the show this season. you and @D8Marko were both standouts even in auditions

tadd gadduang and marko germar, god bless to both of you! (click on the names for their twitter accounts.) hope you too can support them in their quest.

now i leave you with a standout performance from the first episode. it's the best for me in that night. this features marko!!! woot woot!

double standards

for people like me who has unhealthy scalp, salon experts recommend scalp treatment. of course, i took it. i am still too young to be bald. i don't want to be bald yet. though it is in my genes, i don't want it to happen now. no no no... gosh, back to the topic.

so one day i went to "tony and jackey" to get the scalp treatment. it was a nice salon with good service. but hairdressers were all koreans. i have no complaints on koreans, don't get me wrong. they cut hair well and have an out of this world style. but i do feel a little frustrated that filipinos now hire koreans to style their hair in the philippines. hmmm... but i still support the salon. i am such a hypocrite.

the salon has filipino assistants attending to the desires of the korean hairdressers. the korean hairdressers only cut the hair and guide the assistant on all the procedures needed. so there i went at around 11am to have my treatment. the assistant shampooed my hair and then applied the treatment, heated it up via a bubble shaped heating machine, and then shampooed again, and finally dried it up ready for cutting. it was around lunch time when the hairdresser finally got to me.

i just asked her to trim my hair shorter. she cut my hair as expected. massaged a little as expected. but then, she continued the treatment (this should have been done by the assistant), massaged my head some more, massaged my face, massaged my neck and then my back. it was enough to ask, do they also offer body massages in here? it was a super nice experience but it was not the usual. i've had 4 treatments before in the same salon but it was not like this. it was so good to the point that i thought bad of the korean stylist. it seemed that a good service was only made because she was asking for a "tip". she even waited by the doorway after i paid as if waiting for the "tip".

but my double standards surfaced. i paid the amount and "tipped" the filipino assistant, but not the korean hairdresser. most of the huge sum i paid would surely go to the hairdresser and the assistant would only get a small portion of it. i pity the filipino assistant and i would rather give more to her than to anyone else. call it double standards but i don't want to receive good service just to get a "tip". why won't they treat all customers the same? do i smell of money? does my face spell money? i don't like that. good service should be for all.

now, just for the benefit of the doubt, maybe she fancies me. i don't look bad, so maybe i am here type. too bad she isn't mine, i have higher standards. wahahahha.

一番作文 - introduction

はじめまして。

私はフリッツです。としは２４さいです。フィリピンのセブとうからきました。

私の家族は父と母だけで兄弟はいません。でも、しんせきがたくさんいるのでさみしくありません。

今は日本でエンジニアとして働いています。仕事はとてもいそがしので、あそびに行く時間がありません。私のせいかつはかわいそうでしょう。

しゅみはアニメやドラマを見ることです。そうして、日本の音楽はおもしろいと思います。フィリピンでは冬がないけれども、ゆきが好きです。ゆきがふったらいつもうれしくなっています。

日本人と話す時に、私はいつも「はい」とへんじしますけども、じつは何を話しているか意味があまり分かりません。日本語をてつだってください。私はがんばります。

よろしくおねがいします。

the sin

had some time alone last saturday. all of my housemates went somewhere. they are all busy with their lives which is like the opposite of mine. the house is so empty... and so silent... and so empty... and so silent... this is driving me crazy.

i browsed for my daily dose of asian stuff. i even watched live feeds for some show airing somewhere. good way to kill time.. great music. hmmm. good music for working out. out of the blue, i did some floor exercises to flatten this bulging tummy. that was fun and hard. great way to sweat it out. ohhh, the show ended and the house felt empty... and silent...

out of the blue, i played "hiphop abs". and after two 40-minute sessions, waaaah.. these routines are killing me. its fun grooving it out, but you feel the burn all over. why are my arms in pain when the program is called "hiphop abs"???? owwww.. this is too much. but i would love to do this again some other time. i just need to eat dinner though.

so out i went, ate dinner and strolled. as i wondered, i wandered... i thought of stuff i normally don't think of. and then i'm far away from home. i guess thinking is bad for me. the more i think, the more i get lost (pun intended). i think too much thinking is bad but yet, i was thinking even with that statement.

my housemates have gone out too long now so i called up only to find out that they went clubbing. owkey... i didn't even know about that. at least they should have invited me. but then i still would have declined. but still, there is a big difference right?

yesterday, sunday we all went to kawasaki to buy things for our fuji mountain climbing expedition. i bought a thicker winter jacket just because it was in the news that someone died from freezing in fuji. i just don't wanna die yet so i'd rather be prepared. much to my surprise, i think i would not die from climbing a mountain but rather from over eating. we had a buffet for lunch and another one for dinner. it is very hard to even laugh nor bend down to get things from the floor.

then there was a long earthquake. maybe it is a sign from above that i've eaten much and should leave right away. but no.... the earthquake didn't stop us from eating more. oh my. all the calories i burned the day before were replenished in 8 folds. oh my...

gluttony kills...

tears

i want to cry...

it is a mixture of emotions really but it makes my eyes well with tears. there is this gloomy aura around me. i don't want to cry but it seems inevitable. damn everything.... all i can recollect now are the worst things. i know that there are many to be thankful for but i can't think of any right now. trying to be positive is not working... at all...

it was not like this this morning... everything was fine earlier. how come that after 2 hours of being awake, i am suddenly feeling the worst???

seeing me reflected in the mirror, you look fine... if you had longer nose, it wouldn't fit with your small eyes and mouth... i am not dissatisfied with the way i look but i'm very much disappointed with these pimple red scars left on my face... they are happily living on my face for a year now... seriously, they should leave... their contract is long overdue. i have tried all sorts of ways to get rid of them but they are just stubborn...

"the irritating one" beside me is getting more irritating. her antics are getting to me. the more i hear her non-energetic voice, the more i feel like bursting. she doesn't feel like working, she said... but her keyboard typing sound is non-stop with the many chat windows open in her screen... all she does is chat all day or read a book all day... and she squirms when she sees her crush and looks at me waiting for some assurance or something... i will never appreciate such girly-plastic-doll moves. to hell with that.

emails are flooding asking for advise. they ask for advise even for the simplest, littlest of things... do you seriously need my input for your email asking for closing of server ports???? it is as simple as:

dear server owners,

please confirm the services running on the below ports. application is not using them so please close them as well if they are not needed.

ports xxx, yyyy

thank you,

is there really a need to ask for inputs on this very short email format??? this is another irritant... i am working in the IT industry so sorry for some jargon.

been checking news about my asian addictions, too... yeah, i am a fanboy... and i'm super glad that they will finally be having a concert in tokyo dome. i really wish i can go and see them live.. but the ticket prices are way above my budget... and it is hard to even understand the procedures for buying a ticket... japan is getting weirder and weirder each day. i'm here closer to my addiction but still so far away... go DBSK!!! go TOHOSHINKI!!! i will still support you, though not during your concert... wahuhuhuhu. i wanna cry some more...

finally, i am an avid reader of blogs. these blogs are supposedly a stress reliever, but today it is not working... the blogs post stuff about their relationships... about their simple conversations in bed... about their struggles of wanting to spend more time with the partner... i can't help but be jealous. i too want to have a partner to share things with, cuddle with, lean on, joke with, laugh with, hug with, etc... i think i am a very sensitive person so i will truly enjoy even those simple things... but i have no one to do those stuff to... i only have myself... thinking back, i can't help but remember how brokenhearted i was with usagi-chan. and we were just friends to begin with. but i did share things with him, leaned on him, joked and laughed with him... i wonder how i would have felt if it were a loving relationship and ended so sudden.... we still see each other though and greet with simple hellos. but it was never like before... do i miss him??? yes. does he miss me??? ...

while writing, my heart would like to burst. and my eyes would like to shed... good thing that lunch time is coming...

TT_TT

thoughts------四十二

yesterday i have read an article of an American who despised the Filipinos in all aspects. he stated that Filipinos call themselves Asians (Chinese, Japanese) although they are only related to them by location. he also stated that Filipinos has never made any contributions to the world...

this has really made me think.

Filipinos call themselves Asians because we really are Asians... should we call ourselves Europeans but are situated in a region called Asia? thats the main logic in there... i guess what he disagreed on is that some Filipinos call themselves Asians to get little credit of what our Asian big brothers (china and japan) have done in shaping this world. yes they have done many things and yes they are known. but looking back on history, Filipinos were never given the chance to succeed and excel in the world because of the colonizers. Spain colonized us for 300+ years and from then on, the country slept because they were only allowed to learn the "doctrina kristiana" and other religious books. then the Americans came and at least taught us things but the country has never got over the ways in the Spanish period. i guess if the Philippines was not colonized, or just had a better colonizer things would be better.

and now that the Philippines has stood on its feet, now that we have started to learn and adapt to new technologies and new ways, now that we are starting to move forward, some people from other countries look down on us. now that we are starting to move, foreigners criticize us. why not help us move out of this slump instead? why not stop laughing at this slowly emerging country and extend your hand instead? how can people in here grow and contribute to the world when even before we open our mouths to speak, our big brothers(developed countries) have already arrived at conclusions to turn us down?

with 3 colonizers (Spain, us, japan) and with globalization at its height, it is very hard to find what it is to be a Filipino. it is very hard to find what is truly authentic Filipino. that is just impossible. the Filipino race, is a mix of cultures. what the Philippines is today is a result of all the cultures mixed together. we surely have adapted and adopted well to all of these and have made it suitable for us. surely you can find traces of Spanish, American, or any other culture and no one is denying it. it doesn't mean that we are copy cats though. it only means that we adapt well.

i do admit that we Filipinos still lack many things but we are surely getting there. no culture is perfect. why not investigate your cultures first and you will definitely see loopholes in it.

the friends... (trenta y dos)

while the asean summit was scheduled and road blockages were here and there, we said "hey, why don't we get together?". wow! what a shock... nice timing...

the fateful day, Saturday the 13th--just a day after the summit opening. the fateful time, 6:30--just on time with the road blockages. the fateful place, AA banilad-- convenient for a friend and i but not to 5 others.

i fetched my friend Claudine and headed to the venue together on taxi. we arrived on time and to our surprise no one was there. after growing roots on our seats we were informed that they are still in Ayala with nowhere else to go. traffic was jammed. a change of venue was finally decided (AA USP).

Claudine and i left the area and headed for foodland or country mall and ride taxi from there. to our surprise again, traffic was jammed there too. we waited for an unoccupied cab and nothing came. cabs have vacant signs on but were occupied. wow. how would we know which to stop. whew...

we walked to country mall with hopes of finding more cabs there. shocks, we only found more passengers waiting for cabs. to our desperation, we even planned to hitch a ride to USP. we waited for some more. walked some more. waited again. changed waiting area. still nothing. a suggestion came. why don't we ride motorcycles for hire (habal-habal)? tonk...

the dilemma was between staying there waiting for an empty cab, or ride a motorcycle on which we only knew the destination but with no idea as to which roads it will take. the latter won. and so we did; convinced that it was the only way to move away from this damned place.

the air was cold, freezing. wind was at my face. my wet hair dried, and flew all over. my phone rang. oh OH... who's on the other line can surely wait. wahihihihi. the ride of our lives (exaggerated) took minutes and 40 bucks. one good thing happened with it though, my hair became perfectly done, wind blown. wahihihihi....

we ate as if there's no tomorrow, talked of past and present experiences, drank a little, stayed for a long time there, rebuilt friendships, made bonds stronger. and the rest is history.

to be continued...