wet but dry

For some reason i cannot fathom, i happened to be with beautiful-eyes chan and loud-cook on a car. It was probably going somewhere for quite sometime now. We were so engrossed in a conversation i couldn't recall when we passed by a girl acquaintance. For some strange turn of events, we decided to take her with us and have some fucking good time with emphasis on fucking (yeah, this entry is a little for adults only. sorry guys, but i got to write what i got to write). The plan was to have some girl with beautiful-eyes and then me with beautiful-eyes action. I couldn't imagine how great that must be for eyes-chan but it must also be tiring and stressful.

So off we went to loud-cook's abode so we can start at the earliest. With only some drinks offered but never accepted, the girl and eyes-chan undressed and caressed each other: slowly and passionately until only their undies were left--black and purple (i'm very much colorblind but those sure were undies). Lips were so locked up that air couldn't possibly enter. It was hot. HOT hot! Piping HOT hot! And sorry but i couldn't contain myself from not joining the fun. I just had too. I was driven by lust and nothing else. I even forgot what i was there for. My sexuality was out of the question. I just had to do it. I fondled the girl's pinkish part. Yeah i did. And yeah it was wet. But as my fingers tried to dug in further, the girl shrunk and shrunk to the point that even my pinky couldn't fit in any longer. It was a disaster! And a total turn off. It's as if she wouldn't allow any part of me to enter her. Was i that disgusting or horrible to her? I couldn't tell. But the moment i got away, she puffed back to normal and they continued their joy to the last drop. It must have been great, they were covered in sweat. It must have been sweet. And i want to have my share.

It was my turn to get happy finally. And i was excited, or at least some part of me was. I allowed some time for eyes-chan to recover. But the doorbell rang. Damn! A friend of the cook's came. Total disaster! So i waited for him to leave. And it seemed like ages has passed. I got engrossed in the conversation as well.

Then i realized that i was left alone with the girl. And i was comforting her for some reason. In that situation i had bigger issues than her; where are eyes-chan and the cook? The girl talked like crazy: a soliloquy but with me in it. She was complaining about her life. No one has loved her ever since. Hmmm... familiar story; she must have read my autobiography. She was crying and sappy in my arms when eyes-chan and the cook came back. It appeared that eyes-chan and the cook went to church. They must be repenting for whatever sins they are about to commit to my willing body. I gave a smile; I can see the hunger in eyes-chan's eyes and i loved it. Who am i to deny such earthly pleasures? That was enough for me. As we were about to satiate our carnal desires, the doorbell rang, again.

Relatives of the cook were welcomed in and it seems they were not going anywhere else for quite some time. What? It was a disaster? I haven't even touched flesh! I haven't even unbuckled my belt. Prolonging my pleasure for the second time was not what i was looking for. I was desperate but i am not an exhibitionist. This was a dilemma i cannot solve. I was planning to be as expressive (read as noisy) as i can. But all of it turned to waste. Eyes-chan and the cook were also frustrated. But how should we proceed?

I had to wake up from this nightmare, that was the answer. And i did... frustrated...

It was not the pleasure i was after. But it was the frustration from having to wait. It was a bad timing but hindered twice must be an omen. I shouldn't be frustrated by a dream, i know. But this one seemed like a reflection of the reality... I am still single... I am still a virgin.

But i can still dream. Which means that i can still sleep. Which means that i will still be waking up in tomorrow's present.

What a dry wet dream... Nightmare!

romeos

i watched a rather interesting film last night and i would like to share it with you guys. pardon for my naivety; i do not watch movies for their cinematography nor any other technical aspects (i do admit that costume and set sometimes triggers me to watch movies). but i watch movies either because i am intrigued by the movie (plot included), the actors look great (contributes around 70% for less advertised movies), there is some fun involved (that includes either comedy or hot seduction), or any mix of the above. that is how unreliable i am.

here is my write-up for Romeos, a 2011 German film.

let me start by saying that the movie was really something. it started with a man, Lukas (rick okon), who just moved to Cologne and was accidentally assigned to the female dormitories. well at least that was what it seemed to me initially. the first scene was awkward with Lukas entering the toilet examining himself in the mirror and then suddenly a woman with towel wrapped around her body(obviously from the shower) came in view. she then screamed her lungs out.

as the years go by

i can't help but wonder... ano kaya ang mangyayari kung naging kami?

wahahahha. wishful thinking lang naman, ano ba kayo. hayaan nyo na ako. kung bakit ba kasi ang torpe torpe ko. ni di ko nga magawang sabihin sa kanya what i'm feeling inside. di gaya ng iba dyan na kung meron mang nararamdaman ay raratsada na agad. hay nako. why is it so hard for me to do the same?

hanggang tingin na lang siguro ako. hanggang silip... hanggang imahenasyon... hanggang... oi over na 'to. baka anong sabihin ng iba dyan. wholesome po ako. kahit makita ko lang ang mga mata nyang nangbibighani habang iniisa-isa nyang hinuhubad ang suot nyang damit ok na sa akin yun. ooops. bweset na keyboard, kahit ano sinusulat. anyway, nakakatunaw kasi mga mata nya. ohhh your eyes your eyes uh uhm uh uhm... shining... (di alam ang lyrics, pasensya). at ang ngiti... bakit ba kasi ganito mga type ko? stop it! stop it!

kung naging kami siguro, buhay ang mundo ko. i'm not saying that it is dead now. i'm not even saying that it is not colorful. well, i think you could say that it would have been brighter and enjoyable. never monotonous. always fun. hmmm... baka magka anne curtis moment din ako, yes i enjoyed it and i'm sure the feeling is mutual.

teka teka, ang layo na nang narating ng utak pero zero sa reality. hay. ikaw naman tumingin sa akin o. kakapagod nang sumilip eh. kahit once lang tapos mag smile ka lang... kodak moment na. wahahahha. hintayin mo na lang ang pag-gigym ko. maaakit ka din ng mga muscles ko. wahahha. bola. at nanaginip na nga ng gising. tinuloy na talaga.

sige lang. libre lang naman mangarap. at ayaw ko din namang mang-agaw kung may nagmamay-ari na (cristine in purple, ikaw na nga). hay buhay. i-blow mo na ang candles mo at ng matigil na ang ilusyon. ay bibili pa pala ako ng cake. bye na muna.

oh your eyes, your eyes...

life has become very much challenging for the past 2 months--it was very hard to breathe, to eat, to sleep, to rest. notice the date of the last entry and this one, it is very much far off. i have been complaining too much with this new schedule i'm in. i hope i get all the recognition i deserve for this.

but in those hardships you were there. and now i'm more confused. i have somehow gotten over this feeling for the past months, but then you are back. and i don't only see you in the corner now, i get to talk to you. which is great, but dangerous at the same time.

i don't want to entertain this at all, never. i don't want to to be in your queue list at all. it's not that i hate waiting (though i really do.) but this is taboo. things are not right specially with the circumstances now.

i know i'm attracted but i don't want this to get in the way. it already takes huge effort to talk to you, but i just have to. it is very uncomfy for me, i can't even look at you in the eye. what more if this feeling gets exposed...

i think it is your eyes... it is like those of puss-n-boots.

i think you have to wear shades all day long. if i don't see your eyes, i think i can survive. don't do those eyes to me. it melts my heart... and makes me confused... and stutter... and then blank... no more words... uttering nonsense... hope you don't notice that you are the reason for those.

and then you'll smile at my blabber. and i'm lost...


damn you!

so near yet so far, part 2.

so near yet so far

i was just curious at first.
you looked fine, nothing special.
but there was this air of mystery around you.

and then i started seeing you everyday.
with this few people around, how can i not see everyone?
and i saw you looking back at me a couple of times as well.
it probably was just an innocent stare.
what reason would you have to look at me like that?
none. but it was too late for now i saw your eyes and i was mesmerized.

with every moment that passes by, i can't help but search for you.
and you were just there, emotionless. uncaring.
is that a mask you're wearing?

i looked at you everyday, thinking what new facial emotion you would show.
i saw a smirk, that was great.
i saw a smile, ok you also know how to smile.
i saw you look amused. it was perfect.

the more i see you, the more i want to know you more.
the more i stare, the more i giggle inside.
and smile thinking of what if's.
is this what they call a crush???

but i have to keep my cool, i don't want to start a scandal.
it's just a simple crush and nothing else.

so help me god.

ang kinauyukan sa dughan (bente nueve)

naglibog ko kun unsa gyud ang akong ibutang. wala man gyud ko kabalo ba unsa akong isuwat karon. ang ako lang nahunahuna-an na ganahan ko musuwat ug bisaya bisag kausa lang gud. ganahan ko makabati sa kong kaugalingon na magbinisaya sa akong utok samtang gasulat niining mga pulong. sa pagkakaron pa lang nalingaw na ko sa akong gipanghunahuna.


sa wala pa nagpasko, niapil ko sa misa de gallo. nalingaw ko sa unang adlaw pa lang kay murag daghan ug tawo unya nakalingkod pa gyud ko. wala ko nagdahum na anaa pa koy malingkuran ato. ug unya naa koy nakitan na usa ka maanyag na nilalalng. naa siya didto nisimba usab. ambot kun unsay naa niya na mura man ko ug permi magpangita.


sa ikaduha nga adlaw, nangita dayun ko kung naa ba gihapon siya. ug naa sad tuod. matahum siya ug pahiyum. dili gayud nako siya makalimtan.


sa ikatulong adlaw wala na ko kasimba. wala kamata kay daghan na man ug tawo sa amo. mauwaw na mamukaw ang among silingan kay daghan na ang makamata. daghan naman gud ko mga paryente na naggikan sa negros.


sa ikaupat, nisimba na sad ko ug kita na sad mi. makalanay na sad ang iyang pahiyum. kana ganing murag pang miss universe na makita tanang ngipon. pero dili ngilad tanawon, angayan kaayo siya.


sa mga sumusunod na adlaw, wala na ko kasimba pa ug balik. magsige man gani ko ug ngisi kun makahinumdum ko ato. wala pa ko kabalo na pwede gyud diay na mahitabo.


sa pagkakaron, nagsige ra ko ug internet, nagsige ug katulog, naghinumdum sa mga niaging panghitabo. gisulit gyud ug maayo ang panahon na nagbakasyon. lisod na raba ni mabalik. lisod na makakita ug lain pang kahigayunan na makatulog ug taas. lisod na makakita ug kahigayunan sa pagmunimuni sa kaugalingon.