38 <~~ onward to greater things

why should i be someone else when I'm happy being me?

why should i be like them when i know I'm not?

why should i change when i know its not for the better?

why should i worry too much when I'm happy with my life?

why am i asking these things?


anyway, I'm happy with my current state but i feel i could still do more. i feel that i could have done more. and this is because i have set limitations to what i can do. i should not have done those. if only given the chance to fly, i will surely spread my wings and soar the skies. but this current state seems to have problems-- the skies are dark. who wants to fly in dark skies?

explore the wonders of this world before these wings of mine collapse.










ps. after grueling days of waiting for the result in jlpt (japanese language profficiency test), after seeing the joys on the faces of my friends who have passed, i finally got my result... yehey i passed level 4. hurrah... onward to level 3...

how far will you go? (thirty seven)

i recently watched a movie via youtube and bang it was really nice...

it was a love story but a different one. i just can't believe that they can go that far for love. even religion prevented their love but love conquered it all. one was a freeloader, no worries for the future. sex with different partners every night but then realized the shallowness of it all. the other was bound with religion. was a devoted one but loved a person deemed wrong by their congregation. they were forcefully separated but in the end they found each other.

here is a line from the movie during the lonely parts:
"tuesday 3 am, once again I'm wide awake waiting for time to mend this part of me that keeps breaking."
this is really touching but by this same line, they met again.

i just hope this kind of love, willing to change and willing to sacrifice, still exists in the world.

i really hope it still does....

36) aishiteiru to itte kure -- say that you love me

i always have this fantasy of me meeting the one I'm destined to be with. and when our eyes meet, the world around will seem to
stop  as if nothing else matters. i have always waited for this moment and is still waiting. i guess I've watched too many damn romantic movies to think this way. but you cant blame a virgin for that...

I've never been in love. i hope i too can experience that feeling. i still believe that love exists no matter how cold i may be to others-- no matter how childish i act. i know that when i finally meet the one nothing else will matter most except God of course.

i know this is still far from happening. i still have too many issues to solve. i just hope this will happen. i don't care where or when, i just hope it will.

and when we finally meet, we will discover the world together... see the world together... face issues that might come together... whoever you are, I'm just here waiting for our roads to cross...






------------all because of another damn romantic movie i recently saw in youtube----------

missing the old days (san juu go)

searched for something from your blog but



i guess you never mentioned it...


longing that you feel the same joy i felt when we met again...


though we never talked that day,


and this awkward feeling was in the air,


i was happy to see you again.......


i never expected it to be the same way as before, but............


i only wished we could have talked some more........


i just hope youre happy to see me as well........


this happened years ago, but i only wrote it now


now that i have stumbled upon your name once again in YM...


but I'm happy with my life now-- with my set of friends...


hope you're happy as well.............






jaa ne!